What is an undecided voter at this point in the election? There may be two types, though they don't follow party lines.
First, obviously, there is the twit. He/She/It can't make up their minds because they have no minds to make up. They are only marginally aware of economic issues or national security concerns, and most certainly have no formed opinions of any sort, other than a predilection for either daytime TV (preferably from a cable network of obscure fame, ex.: "347- The Animal Prostitutes Channel"); or ESPN Radio.
Second, the "Contrarian"; and there ain't a worse social disease out there. This person considers their opinions to be equated with gold bullion or sacred texts. They are critically concerned with these issues:
A) Themselves
B) Their Investments.
C) Their determination NEVER to approve of any government, spiritual or intellectual authority.
D) Their goal of never committing their personal time to anything outside their immediate interests.
E) Their eternal quest to NEVER pay any price, tax or compliment to a higher (they read that as 'lower') agency.
Visible indicators of the Contrarian? Pursed lips, like they just sucked on a lemon, when asked to make a decision ... on anything. Slacks or skirts often torn from their eternal perch on fence tops. Smirks whenever other breathing entities express passion, compassion, concern, anger or happiness in regards to ... again, anything. Exaggerated sighing and sense of self-worth.
As I had said above, this disease is not limited to those of any particular ethnicity, religion or level of income. Commonly referred to in medical and psychology texts in the Latin as Contrarianus Maximus, the malady was originally confined to France (with the exception of Provence and the Languedoc region), but soon migrated across the world to all nations.
And though there have been many concerted efforts to find a cure through medical research, fundraising and the "Walk Against Conceit" campaigns by the yogurt companies; still there is no progress. We are stuck with them, and the Monster-that-be-the-MEE-DEE-YA informs us that if the 'undecideds' aren't placated, primped, patted and pleased then All the Demons of Hell shall be loosed upon our over-opinionated selves.
Feck that. Feck THEM. If you haven't got an actual opinion yet on the issue of who's to be the next POTUS, then you are either a Twit or a Twat (as our Jolly English cousins like to say, not the nasty thang you be thinking). And if your are a twit, well ... you get a pass. Can't be helped.
But if your are a twat, beware! Your days are numbered. America and the rest of the world not only want change, they want ACTION. When the masters of the Universe gather at Haavard B School not to congratulate each other, but to figure out how THEY can contribute to Society's Infrastructure through "Social Investment", then the hour of doom for Contrarians is at hand.
In November, there will be a decision made, it will most likely be for Obama, and I am very sorry to tell you Contrarians that the rest of the nation --- nay, the world! --- expects you to get off the pot.
Or just go shit yourselves.
3 comments:
Bravo Sir! So happy you are back with your pontifications. Extra props go to the picture of the snooty Maitre'd in "Ferris Bueller's Day Off." Thought you could pinch us with that, didn't ye?
Did you work at Microsoft once upon a time? Seriously? I have been exposed to more of the B classification there than I ever knew existed. And it is such a lovely thing. Being around people who are likely smarter than me at putting 0s and 1s together, but otherwise, feh.
The Snooty Maitre'D was one of the first pix that came up in a google of Snooty People/Images. I thought he looked just sphincter-pinched enough for the job.
Microsofty? Moi? No never. I have worked WITH them, but not FOR them. My big bruddah does, however. And though I wish to lambast him occasionally for the association, he can get me free parking in NYC midtown --- so shut my mouth!
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